articles
Q&A: How Do I Tell My Partner I Want To Be Dominated?
Q: I think I would love to be dominated. I’ve been fantasising about being ordered to strip, and being tied down and fucked. I have a boyfriend and he’s great but he’s just not a pushy type of guy. I’m not sure he’s into it. How can I tell him I’m interested in being dominated?
Your question is not an uncommon one, so thank you for putting it out there. Initially, let’s put the sort of dominance you’re seeking into some sort of context, as there are as many different ways of dominating as there are Dominant people! READ MORE
BDSM Basics: Impact Play
On its most basic level, Impact Play is simply mutual gratification (sexual or otherwise) from repetitive contact to the body. Impact can be delivered by an array of tools and techniques, depending on the intent of the play. For some, it’s tied in with their fondness for Sensation Play, for others it’s about how much pain can be given or received, or the resulting bruises and marks may give them their high. Depending on the players themselves, the intent of the play, and the tools being used, Impact Play opens up an extremely rich world of sights and sensations. READ MORE
BDSM BASICS: The Kink Dictionary
Language is constantly growing and changing, and even more so in the kink community, as it finds some mainstream acceptance and people discover new and novel ways to play, and things to fetishise. This glossary was compiled using keyword searches, community consultation, social media, and traditional dictionaries, and aims to serve as a fairly comprehensive beginner’s guide to the 100 most common words in a kink conversation.
READ MORE
Dipping Your Toes Into the World of Foot Fetish
Feet, and their associated objects, are without doubt the most fetishised of body parts. Known in neuroscience and psychology as 'podophilia' - not to be confused with 'podiphilia' (unless you're into bicycles) - it's so common, that it has made it's way into pop culture without much thought. Consider the films of Quentin Tarantino - not only is the nude foot captured in almost all of his films, the screen time he dedicates to the foot is quite astounding. Uma Thurman's wonderful toes aside, what IS it about feet that makes them so appealing? Why is it the most prevalent of fetishes? READ MORE
Beginning Your Kink Journey
So you’ve worked out you’re kinky, huh? You have a fetish and you want to explore it. There’s all these incredible ideas in your head, and they grow exponentially, each building onto the other, until one day you realise you this doesn’t have to be total fantasy. You decide you want to PLAY! READ MORE
BDSM: Inside the Kinky Lifestyle
For me, the world of BDSM is generally a gentle and peaceful place. In this subculture, I find my boundaries respected in unique ways, and the majority of folk are able to engage in more than idle chit-chat.The community as a whole tries to uphold many of the values I hold dear: encouragement of individual authenticity, acceptance of others, and an unmatched enthusiasm for curiosity. For me, it’s reminiscent of a time before I knew how to judge people and before I feared what people might think of me, or do to me. READ MORE
MisKnickers Guide To Buying Sex Toys
‘But I’ve Never Been To A Sex Shop…’
Since the advent of online shopping, sex toy sales have drastically increased, particularly from female buyers. In terms of anonymity, it’s great; there’s no bumping into another school mum when you buy online. It can also be really useful for replacing toys you already know and love.
However, visiting a sex shop will give you a new perspective on the toys, and your reaction to them. Never been before? Here’s some tips for starting out. READ MORE
Masturbation For Couples - Happy Handjobs
Now, I’m not going to bash you over the head with a dildo promoting the benefits of masturbation – there are people much more qualified than myself to discuss it therapeutically – let’s just take it as a given that pleasuring oneself is beneficial. Seeing as though masturbation is generally seen as a solo venture, what I’d like to do is make sure couples don’t feel excluded from all the awesome. So here’s some tips and toys that couples can use to incorporate masturbation into their shared experience. READ MORE
Masturbation For Couples - Pussy Play
For women, masturbation can be an external or internal experience, and there’s thought to be at least four different orgasms women are able to achieve: clitoral, vaginal, multiple, and ‘all of the above’. This makes Pussy Play all kinds of fun – and a wonderfully exciting challenge… How many ways can you or your partner cum this month? And how can you help? READ MORE
Why We Wax: Hair Removal Through History
I assumed the full removal of pubic hair was a recently new fad, probably fed by pornography and female objectification. I have no doubt that the sex industry promotes and markets these fashions, and it can absolutely be used for objectification only. What I didn’t realise is how long these techniques have been practised; the various reasons—besides aesthetics—for removing public hair, and how pubic hair (or the lack of it) has been seen as a signifier of class and health... READ MORE
The Aussie Porn Invasion
At the moment the fastest growing audience for porn is women. This doesn’t come as much of a surprise when you consider they’re the biggest group to be excluded (as viewers), be it by societal taboos, film content, or physical accessibility. The internet changed all that; easy access (no more trips to the XXX Shoppe), more content than you could ever need, and a new idea of anonymity that allows many taboos to be dropped... READ MORE
Are You Ready For the Kink Scene?
In my experience, lots of people are interested in some kind of kink, to varying degrees—the giving or receiving of bondage, physical pain, role-play, dress-ups, dominance and/or submission; the list is pretty much endless. Socially we’ve shifted a bit in the last couple of years. Since we’ve had a best-selling book and a feature film portraying a version of BDSM, there has been much more conversation around the topic and some of the myths surrounding a kink lifestyle have been challenged by those who live it. People are starting to accept that BDSM is not abuse (and if it is, it’s not BDSM)... READ MORE
Q: I think I would love to be dominated. I’ve been fantasising about being ordered to strip, and being tied down and fucked. I have a boyfriend and he’s great but he’s just not a pushy type of guy. I’m not sure he’s into it. How can I tell him I’m interested in being dominated?
Your question is not an uncommon one, so thank you for putting it out there. Initially, let’s put the sort of dominance you’re seeking into some sort of context, as there are as many different ways of dominating as there are Dominant people! READ MORE
BDSM Basics: Impact Play
On its most basic level, Impact Play is simply mutual gratification (sexual or otherwise) from repetitive contact to the body. Impact can be delivered by an array of tools and techniques, depending on the intent of the play. For some, it’s tied in with their fondness for Sensation Play, for others it’s about how much pain can be given or received, or the resulting bruises and marks may give them their high. Depending on the players themselves, the intent of the play, and the tools being used, Impact Play opens up an extremely rich world of sights and sensations. READ MORE
BDSM BASICS: The Kink Dictionary
Language is constantly growing and changing, and even more so in the kink community, as it finds some mainstream acceptance and people discover new and novel ways to play, and things to fetishise. This glossary was compiled using keyword searches, community consultation, social media, and traditional dictionaries, and aims to serve as a fairly comprehensive beginner’s guide to the 100 most common words in a kink conversation.
READ MORE
Dipping Your Toes Into the World of Foot Fetish
Feet, and their associated objects, are without doubt the most fetishised of body parts. Known in neuroscience and psychology as 'podophilia' - not to be confused with 'podiphilia' (unless you're into bicycles) - it's so common, that it has made it's way into pop culture without much thought. Consider the films of Quentin Tarantino - not only is the nude foot captured in almost all of his films, the screen time he dedicates to the foot is quite astounding. Uma Thurman's wonderful toes aside, what IS it about feet that makes them so appealing? Why is it the most prevalent of fetishes? READ MORE
Beginning Your Kink Journey
So you’ve worked out you’re kinky, huh? You have a fetish and you want to explore it. There’s all these incredible ideas in your head, and they grow exponentially, each building onto the other, until one day you realise you this doesn’t have to be total fantasy. You decide you want to PLAY! READ MORE
BDSM: Inside the Kinky Lifestyle
For me, the world of BDSM is generally a gentle and peaceful place. In this subculture, I find my boundaries respected in unique ways, and the majority of folk are able to engage in more than idle chit-chat.The community as a whole tries to uphold many of the values I hold dear: encouragement of individual authenticity, acceptance of others, and an unmatched enthusiasm for curiosity. For me, it’s reminiscent of a time before I knew how to judge people and before I feared what people might think of me, or do to me. READ MORE
MisKnickers Guide To Buying Sex Toys
‘But I’ve Never Been To A Sex Shop…’
Since the advent of online shopping, sex toy sales have drastically increased, particularly from female buyers. In terms of anonymity, it’s great; there’s no bumping into another school mum when you buy online. It can also be really useful for replacing toys you already know and love.
However, visiting a sex shop will give you a new perspective on the toys, and your reaction to them. Never been before? Here’s some tips for starting out. READ MORE
Masturbation For Couples - Happy Handjobs
Now, I’m not going to bash you over the head with a dildo promoting the benefits of masturbation – there are people much more qualified than myself to discuss it therapeutically – let’s just take it as a given that pleasuring oneself is beneficial. Seeing as though masturbation is generally seen as a solo venture, what I’d like to do is make sure couples don’t feel excluded from all the awesome. So here’s some tips and toys that couples can use to incorporate masturbation into their shared experience. READ MORE
Masturbation For Couples - Pussy Play
For women, masturbation can be an external or internal experience, and there’s thought to be at least four different orgasms women are able to achieve: clitoral, vaginal, multiple, and ‘all of the above’. This makes Pussy Play all kinds of fun – and a wonderfully exciting challenge… How many ways can you or your partner cum this month? And how can you help? READ MORE
Why We Wax: Hair Removal Through History
I assumed the full removal of pubic hair was a recently new fad, probably fed by pornography and female objectification. I have no doubt that the sex industry promotes and markets these fashions, and it can absolutely be used for objectification only. What I didn’t realise is how long these techniques have been practised; the various reasons—besides aesthetics—for removing public hair, and how pubic hair (or the lack of it) has been seen as a signifier of class and health... READ MORE
The Aussie Porn Invasion
At the moment the fastest growing audience for porn is women. This doesn’t come as much of a surprise when you consider they’re the biggest group to be excluded (as viewers), be it by societal taboos, film content, or physical accessibility. The internet changed all that; easy access (no more trips to the XXX Shoppe), more content than you could ever need, and a new idea of anonymity that allows many taboos to be dropped... READ MORE
Are You Ready For the Kink Scene?
In my experience, lots of people are interested in some kind of kink, to varying degrees—the giving or receiving of bondage, physical pain, role-play, dress-ups, dominance and/or submission; the list is pretty much endless. Socially we’ve shifted a bit in the last couple of years. Since we’ve had a best-selling book and a feature film portraying a version of BDSM, there has been much more conversation around the topic and some of the myths surrounding a kink lifestyle have been challenged by those who live it. People are starting to accept that BDSM is not abuse (and if it is, it’s not BDSM)... READ MORE